Saturday, July 16, 2011

Fairy tale

"Once upon a time......And they lived happily ever after."

Commonly perceived as the perfect example of optimist, though I doubt myself for this description, but maybe, I am as described. Always thinking of the best, hoping tomorrow will be a better day and BELIEVING miracles will happen one day. All are just matter of time. Leading a simple life and frequently "simple-minded", I'm a happy-go-lucky person. Never hold on to grudges on others for long, though I blame myself for certain stuffs until today, I will usually forgive those people after a good night sleep. Good in a way, that it is to my Lord's pleasure to forgive, but to a certain extend, I am easily bullied. I see that. But, i just don't know how to hold onto a matter, which up to my conscience until today, nothing seems to be worth being angry at over a long period of time. Just forgive, forget and lead a happy life! :)

I know. Life is not as simple as described. Many times, many events, many people, we could let go not.

Criticised by my landlady today, I started to take notice of this over-optimist disposition of mine. "You think everything so nice? You think you living in a fairy tale? You think you are cinderella? I tell you, many people out there are suffering! You are just one of the very few lucky ones!" It hit me. Yes, as i started to reflect back, my endeavors have been rather easy ones, as compared to others. The rewards and goals I have achieved do not seems to be proportional to the hard work I have put into. Others might have traded many sleepless nights to get what I have been gracefully blessed with. (though I may look hardworking, actually my mind is floating every where many times) Things...just come. Miracles....just happen. Stuffs that I really longed for....just roll over.

Feeling undeserving at many times, many moments, I thank God truthfully from the apex of my heart and am really grateful for whatever He has given me all this while, purely out of His grace. Yet I must clarify, I do take things for granted and act like an ungrateful bastard at infinite frequency. And also not forgetting my parents and siblings, for giving all the best they could ever afford. (my parents do play a major part in rooting optimism in me.)

So,
Should I move away from the "cinderella" mindset and come back to reality? Or should I keep my "excessive optimism"?

One matter of total certainty though - God loves us, more than any of us could ever imagine.

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