Friday, April 13, 2012

Bumming around

Can't believe I actually went out in my pyjamas today. Not some silly secondary school over-sized club shirt and shorts but real pyjamas, a pink one, with a bear in front. Gah, you know your holiday is simply too long when you are starting to get a bit too lazy. K lah, to be honest, I went out of the house but not of the car. My mom went to the clinic and needed somebody to sit in the car because there was no parking around, so she dragged me out. I just slept in the passenger seat for almost an hour, in my pink pyjamas with this super huge sunglasses on, so people don't know that I'm actually sleeping like a pig. Goodness...laziness, if I don't overcome that as soon as possible, I don't know what will happen in uni. To make the matters worse, I am getting comfortable with being antisocial. How lah?!

The funny thing is that when I was sober a few hours later, (which is about noon time = complete lost of regimen) I was lamenting about how sad my current life is. No social life, no work, not many aims, no concrete plans, below zero production level, stuck around the same places almost every day. I am almost at the brink of pulling my hair, screaming I NEED TO DO SOMETHING NAO!  The fact is, I was only introduced to this sedentary lifestyle at home about less than 2 weeks ago. Butt-itches-can't-sit-still type of person. I tried to look for job, but no one wants to hire me because I am travelling around again soon and no one really wants part-timers over here, only post-A levels type some more. Believe it or not, I was so desperate to find something to do I actually asked my mom to ask her beautician if I can be her shampoo girl. She literally ROFL then said, no. (What's so funny about that?!) Want to be shampoo girl also no one wants, how am I going to survive next time! I gave up looking for jobs, considering the fact that I am travelling out of the country again next next week until next month. So much for "not leaving the house until there is something urgent or absolutely necessary". =.=" 

 Finally, I resolved to studying and taking music lessons. And yet just a few months ago I promised myself to not touch any academic books for my gap year. Hmph.

Refreshing the facebook page every 5 minutes suddenly becomes a very depressing act. You see your friends moved on with their life, new friends, new jobs, new universities and you are still stuck here. My mind has moved on but my heart yearns to linger around.  I will stay away from Facebook until I figure out how to fully utilise my free time here.Another interesting observation is that I have more friends doing law, economics, accounting and business than medics or engineering. Come to think of it, it's actually a good thing having more friends in other fields at this age before I plunge myself into the oh-so-medical world so next time when I face litigations/starting a business, I would know who to turn to for FOC services. Materialistic betul. Tsk. 

Maybe I'm just too used to living in a pressurized environment for years. I grew up in that condition, with never-ending to-do list. Now that I am given the time to do nothing at all, I just can't take this idea of wasting my time. This is what we, Asians do. We work all the time. But....hullo, I am about to be in my prime now (or have I passed that era?), how can I just be bumming around whole day? A little rest is enough, too much is just unacceptable. Reminiscing about the good ol' days of training for the marathons and that was just less than a year ago. My brain cells are gone, so have my muscle tissues in dormant state.

Well, mom kept telling me I need to learn how to enjoy doing nothing. Teach me lah, how? My life has been revolving about myself too much, time to revise and correct the course! Sighs.

Oh wait, it's mid-April! *twirls* 


LX said...

My 8 months of bumming around made me a depressed girl because I couldn't afford to travel and no one wanted to hire me. However, I picked up tennis again and loved it to bits. In between, I do the wait in the car business for my mum too!! Doing nothing made me feel so, so useless.. but hey, at least you have a proper fresh start soon!

Christine Wong said...

Our moms are just too similar. Sometimes I read your posts about what your mom said, my mom told me the same thing. I guess that's what BFFs do. LOLS. Who you played tennis with? Everyone seems to be so busy... I do sense that depression growing now. JK! Yes, I can't wait to start uni now! And when you come back, we should hang out. :)

LX said...

I went took lessons with my sis's coach.. learnt with the sehkias who were so much more pro than the noob me!! One little kid asked if I got number 1 in class.. I cincai replied yes and he didn't believe because he said his dad told him if you get number 1, you would be in Oxford, Cambridge or Harvard. LOL! Yes, will look you up if you haven't gone off when I'm back :)